Sears

Craftsman used to be great.  Lifetime warranty on all their tools, a major player in the racing world: they were top notch.  Now - they suck donkey balls.

Last year, I brought in a Craftsman drill to their tools department.  It belonged to my grandfather, and was probably purchased in the mid-70's.  Stamped to the side was a placard that stated "LIFETIME GUARANTEE".  Sadly, after 40+ years of service, the drill was dead, so, according to the unlimited warranty riveted to the side of the drill, I looked to get a replacement.  (In all honesty, I knew it was a ridiculous stretch, and hoped for a $10 coupon or something.)  Long story short, they flat out told me that Sears no longer honors ANY of its lifetime warranties, no matter if it was sold in 1935 or 2010.

Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I find that to be absolute bullshit.  Until this afternoon, I chose not to buy another Sears product again.  I don't like liars.  However, I needed a rivet gun, and the wife was returning a shirt on the other side of the mall, so I decided to just go and buy one while I was waiting.

The rivet gun was $20 and a pack of rivets was $5.  I brought it to the counter, and the sales lady (easily 80 years old) asked if I wanted to put it on my Sears card.   

no.

Do you want to sign up for a Sears card and save $15 blah, blah, blah.   

no.

Are you part of our loyalty program?

no.

Would you like to sign up and get special offers?

no.

Okay, what's your phone number?  

None of your business.

I have to put a phone number in to complete the transaction...

1-234-567-8910.

Would you like to purchase an additional warranty for the tool your buying?

no.

It's only half the cost of the whole tool, and extends the warranty by 12 months.

no.

Are you sure?

Lady, I'm buying the equivalent of a stapler.  If it stops working in the next 12 months, I'll probably throw it out so that I don't have to deal with you again.

Okay, I need your phone number again.  

Seriously?

Do you want to run it debit or credit?

Here's $30 in cash.  More than necessary to buy the rivet gun and the rivets.  I'm taking it, and walking out the door.

Sir, I need...

Bye.

I'm sorry, but I'm fucking DONE with Sears.  Where did I put that Snap-on catalog?

P.S.  I found out that Sears wouldn't uphold the lifetime warranty for its tool to Katrina victims, since they were guilty of flood damage.  http://consumerist.com/2007/03/the-softer-side-of-sears-craftsman-lifetime-warranty-doesnt-apply-to-katrina-victims.html  Fuck Sears.

P.P.S  I went to try it out for the first time, and all the nuts and bolts holding it together popped out and the tool won't even work.  Again, fuck Sears.